ApplesofDecency, do you find it painful when I get funky?

ApplesofDecency tried very hard to annoy me during a match tonight. He thought I was camping because I wanted to increase my kill to death ratio. To be fair, I was camping. But it was on Carnival and I always camp in the building since it's the focus of the map and everyone tries to take it. I was NOT trying to increase my K/D ratio.

He tried to lay down in front of me to block my view, but he died first. The other team never even saw me. Plus, I was laying in a spot that no matter where he stood or crouched, I could still see the door opening. Then he tried shooting me to let the other team know where I was. The whole time telling me that I couldn't be having fun just camping.

That couldn't have been farther from the truth.

I was really enjoying getting under his skin. Especially after my 1-3 start. He was extremely happy that I started with only a few kills. He was almost giddy with pride. But then it changed. All of a sudden, I was rattling off death like Sly Stallone in Rambo.


Every time I got a kill, I thanked him. What he didn't realize is that not only was he dying when the other team stormed the building, the other team just kept coming because they knew someone was there. And I just kept picking them off...like a pimp.

I had my killstreaks lined up as Predator Missile - Harrier Airstrike - Emergency Air Drop. I rattled off a 14 kill streak before I could even call anything in. After getting noob-tubed...finally...I called everything in. I got a Precision Airstrike, Sentry Gun and two Counter-UAVs. I rattled off a 9 kill streak and finished the match like 24-4.

Too bad the little bitch didn't stick around and take his verbal lashing like a man. After taunting him for most of the next match, he left with his tale between his legs.

So if you see ApplesofDecency on XBOX Live, please thank him for Lunchbox37. I owe one of my favorite matches ever to him.

Thanks again, buddy!

And of course, I avoided him, filed a complaint and muted him.

You can take a look at his XBOX Live Gamertag HERE.

This is his digital representation of what he thinks he is...


And what does his actual XBOX Live bio say?

Do you find it painful when I get funky?

Yup. A nice douchetastic bio. So ApplesofDecency, do ya?