LIVE NUDE SMODCAST!!! Kevin Smith & Scott Mosier Live in Madison, WI

Do you have $30 dollars?
Do you like the comedic stylings of Kevin Smith?

Then you'll love Live Nude Smod!

On June 23, the Live Nude Smod Tour 2: The Wee Wee Tour comes to the Majestic Theatre in Madison, WI. Listen and experience a live recording of Smodcast, the iTunes bestselling podcast. It is only the 2nd time Kevin Smith has appeared in Wisconsin.

See him live! Nothing beats it!

Get Tickets Here:

7 PM Show

10 PM Show

The Official Site:

The ViewAskewniverse


Tour brought to you by FLESHLIGHT: The The #1 Selling Male Sex Toy in the World.

The A-Team: Earning an A for Awesomeness! Reviews and Critques from Around the Net

Don't be afraid to read this post. There are NO spoilers below. I would not do that to A-Team fans.



I just got back from my 2nd showing of The A-Team. It gets better each time. I plan on going again Monday or Tuesday. A few people have questioned the quality of the movie. My response? Don't worry about it. Go and enjoy The A-Team for what it is — a fun, explosive, quick-witted summer tent pole movie. It doesn't try to be The Godfather or The Shawshank Redemption. It stays close enough to the original TV series to make the Fanboys happy while also creating enough personality to stand on it's own.

Don't believe me? See for yourself...watch the trailer HERE.



Here are review snippets from around the world...

Plays the overkill card and wins! —Milwaukee Journal Sentinel

Wise-Cracking A-Team Blows Stuff Up. -Wired

It's just flat-out fun, with a cheeky sense of humor - way more enjoyable than you might expect. —Associated Press

It's not just the action that makes the movie go, the cast is great. —Seattle Post-Intelligencer

The A-Team is completely insane, totally preposterous, and sort of wonderful, in a junk food kind of way. —Flick Filosopher

The latest TV remake finally delivers what the multiplex has been sorely lacking: pure, unabashed fun. —News-a-Rama

True to the decade that inspired this movie, nothing's too big, too bold, too shameless. —New York Daily News

The A-Team might be selling itself as an action flick, but in its heart of hearts, it's just a hopeless bromantic. —Washington Post

Overflowing with what sounds like billions of bullets and beaucoup broken glass, this film version of the hit 1980s TV series about soldiers of fortune is an experience. —Los Angles Times

If you like over-the-top summer action movies, you’ll leave the movie entertained and happy. —Hot Indie News

I love it when a plan comes together! —Empire Movies

The A-Team is a gigantic pile of ear-deafening nonsense, but it is brisk and goofy and well shot. —Miami Herald

Backed by a great cast, breathtaking visual effects and a sharp script, almost everything goes according to plan. —WSOC Channel 9

Pity the fool who misses The A-Team! —Merced Sun-Star

I’m starting to wonder if The A-Team isn’t actually close to brilliant. —Movie Line

The A-Team aspires to be a big, dumb and stupid action movie, and it fulfills that goal. —Northwest Herald

The A-Team is loud and dumb. In other words, the perfect summer movie. —The Colorado Springs Gazette

The action sequences flow beautifully and have a great energy about them. —Taiwan News

A throwback of sorts, it reminds us of a time when action movies weren’t drenched in blood, unnecessarily profane, sexually overt or dumb as a sack of hammers. —Gwinnett Daily Post

The action is first-class, and the acting cheesy enough from all concerned to do the original TV series proud. —Today

A fine time is had by actors in roles that are often as meaty as they are silly. They balance bravado, noble or corrupt, with appropriate irony, almost as if according to plan. —Seattle Times

It's arguable that no one has ever produced a movie that's this jam-packed with bluster and noise, hurtling metal, hair-breadth escapes, eyeball-filling explosions, snark-under-pressure one-liners, and so-gung-ho-it's-almost-nostalgic American ass-kickery. —Entertainment Weekly

It's big, loud and ludicrous. But pity the fool who lets that stand in the way of enjoying The A-Team. —Rolling Stone

Makes no apologies for this absurdity; it struts around with enough bravado to fill 1,000 locker rooms. And why shouldn't it? This movie delivers! -Milwaukee Journal Sentinel



Still don't believe me that The A-Team is a wild ride? Check out the movie yourself. Buy tickets at MovieTickets.com HERE.

Also, one last thing, if you’re a fan of the show, stay past the credits.



Please understand that I'm an A-Team Fanboy. You can tell me the movie sucks. You can nitpick it til the cows come home. You will not change my mind. You can try. But you WILL fail.

2nd Annual Bobblehead Doll Day Tailgate Party

Fun Times in MadTown

Just got back from MadTown. I had a blast sitting around the fire with the guys on Saturday and at a birthday party with friends on Sunday. Good times...good times.

A Great Start to Miller Park Season!

The Brewers win 7-5! Not a bad way to start my 2010 season at Miller Park. Not. Bad. At. All.

2010 Milwaukee Brewers Predictions, Promises and Possibilities

Prediction:
I predict the Brewers will finish the season at 88-74. With that record, the Brewers will win the wild card and host at least one play-off game.

I would settle for any record that gets the Brewers to the play-offs and would be ecstatic with a record good enough to win the division. Then again, with the Cardinals pitching and hitting, I don't think the Brewers will overtake them. Just not enough pitching for the Brew Crew.



Possibilities:

• If Pujols gets hurt, Prince could win the MVP.
• Then again, Prince might not be a Brewer by the end of the year.
• Randy Wolf will disappoint, but not on the Jeff Suppan level. He'll be good, just not ace material.
• Yovani Gallardo, on the other hand, will be an ace and prove it each start.
• If Yo stays healthy, he will be top 3 in the Cy Young voting.
• Alcides Escobar will finish in the top 3 in NL Rookie of the Year voting. He should win it, but won't have the sexy stats like that beast in Atlanta will.
• Jeff Suppan will not end the season on the Brewers active roster. Doug Melvin will either cut his ass or stash Soup on the DL.

Promises:

• The Cubs will still suck.
• The Brewers will finish with a winning record against the Cubs.
• Prince will finish in the top 5 in MVP voting.
• Craig Counsell will once again prove he's the best bench player in the league. Yes. The League.
• Corey Hart will end the 2010 season on a different team.
• The Brewers will have at least 3 All-Stars. Prince and Braunie are locks. Maybe Hoffman or Yo.
• The Brewers will somehow piss off some team. It might be a team celebration. It might be Braunie's attitude. Either way, the bean balls will be a flying.
• Matt's going to miss yelling "J, J, J, J" at the games.
• The Brewers will finish above .500 and be in contention for a play-off spot all year.

I hope to get to at least 2 games a month. I do want to get some club seats this year and maybe a Friday's table. Actually, I don't REALLY care where I sit as long as the Brewers win!



I'm sure many people will disagree with my prognostications, but who gives a fuck. If Yo or Prince or Braunie goes down with an injury, the Brewers season is over. If everything goes according to plan, more baseball awaits Brewer fans in October.



GO BREW CREW GO!

Spring Is Here...And So Are the Projects!

So this past weekend and with spring slowly arriving, my Dad and I decided to cross a project off the to-do list. Since I moved back, some of my DVDs have been in boxes while others were spread around the basement. I had grand plans to build DVD racks for them, but over the last 18 months the project kept getting shoved aside. But the time had come to go at it.



So I drew up some plans and headed out to The Home Depot with the old man to pick up some supplies.



Since my unfortunate termination, (Go fuck yourself, Gads!) the Depot seems to have gone downhill or the hiring standards lowered. We spent over an hour picking through the boards to find straight ones. After that, we went to the checkout to finish the spree. We picked an empty lane stationed by a moderately attractive cashier. I'm glad I did. Because she was not so bright...to say the least. I bought 25 boards and she only counted 24. I also bought 3 sheets of paneling, but she only charged me for 1. (I would like to think she didn't charge because of my stunning looks, but I know better...she's stupid.) I don't remember her name, but thank you! You saved me 19%! So with my truck loaded up, we headed back home.



And then it was drama time. My dad and I have too close of personalities to spend too much time that close to each other. It took all of 5 minutes before the bickering began. My dad has his way of doing things. I have the right way to do things. After an hour or so, we found our rhythm. The only thing that slowed us down was the clock.



Once Sunday morning rolled around, we got back at it. After an hour of assembly, the racks came together quite nice. After a day and a half of measuring, routing, cutting, sanding, assembling and screaming, the racks were complete.



Before I could check this project off the list my OCD had to alphabetize the DVD collection. It took almost as long to sort as it did to assemble.



And it's FINISHED!!! Damn nice too, if you ask me.



This was the first woodworking project my Dad and I worked on since woodworking group in 4-H over 15 years ago. It was fun, irritating, entertaining, enlightening, aggravating and something I would do again in a heartbeat.

Activision Can Go Fuck Itself

First of all, it's about fucking time. New maps should be out within 90 days of release and then again after 180 if there are still plenty of gamers playing. (Which CoD:MW2 will still have.)

Here's IW and Activision clever site about a stimulus package called, "Mapathy."

Unfortunately, the only thing it will stimulate is the wallet of Activision.

I'm not sure if everyone's heard (Check out Major Nelson's Podcast HERE) but the new maps for CoD:MW2 are going to be 1200 points ($15.) There are 3 brand new maps and 2 maps updated from CoD4:MW. The old maps are Overgrown and Crash. Not even great maps.



I would have been okay with Crossfire (my personal favorite) and Strike. Overgrown always had way too many snipers and Crash was one sided depending on what end you spawned.



I'm not giving Activision my money for this set. Maybe if they drop it to 800 points ($10.) And even that is high considering there are really only 3 new maps. They better get the lube ready for everyone they're about to fuck. Hey Activision, GO FUCK YOURSELVES!

If you want to express your displeasure, tweet IW's Robert Bowling at @fourzerotwo. Also, add #MW2StimulusSucks to your tweet.

And of course, VOTE WITH YOUR WALLET! Tell Activision to FUCK OFF by NOT paying for the map pack.

An Evening with Kevin Smith at the Pabst Theatre

Doug and I headed down to the Pabst Theatre to see An Evening with Kevin Smith. It ranged from the unbelievable (Flesh light, anyone?) to the shocking (sucking his own dick) to the disgusting (trying to pop a leg zit and having his wife walk him on him) to the touching (the story about what George Carlin meant to him damn near caused him and the crowd to turn on the water works) to the funny (Who am I kidding? Damn near everything was funny.) Basically, it was everything I was hoping for and more. If you're even a moderate fan of Kevin's, you need to see him live. This was my 5th time and it gets better every time.

Markllennium Falcon Speeds Past the 200k Parsec Barrier

Sorry, if you didn't understand my geek speak. For normal people, my truck just rolled over 200,000 miles. And it's still going strong. I'm proud that my S-10 has lasted this long. And not to get too greedy, but I hope it lasts a few more years. Parting is such sweet sorrow.

In honor of this momentous occasion, I figured I'd share my favorite truck stories.

Horny Pornstar - Three things you need to know about this one. First, Jeff got pulled over for speeding in Georgia. Second, Doug's an asshole. Third, damn kids.

Georgia Return Trip - Jeff and I moved Doug and Linnea to Georgia. This was about a week after my stereo was stolen out of my truck so I had no radio. On the way back, we stopped at a Wal-Mart in Knoxville and I bought a CD player, some speakers and the Len album with "Steal My Sunshine" on it. The whole way home, we listened to that song because Len talked about Mark and Karen (my semi crush) in the lyrics. Yes, that sound you hear is my dignity flushing down the toilet.

Trailer Surfing - Jeff, Doug and I hooked up a trailer to my truck and went trailer surfing through the field and down the road. It was stupid. It was probably illegal. But damn was it fun.

Chair Surfing - My parents were getting rid of an old Lazy Boy recliner so Jeff and I thought we'd have some fun with it. We chained it to the back of the truck and took turns pulling each other in it. That moment was the most Redneck I've ever felt.

Jersey Trip - Quite possibly the worst time ever in my truck. Jeff managed to rear end a mini van in downtown Chicago three hours into a 14 hour trip. However, that trip also took us to the QuikStop. My truck made it all the way to my Graceland. All in all, that trip was about even.

Top Gun - I just had a sunroof installed, but I was an idiot. I tried opening the sunroof while driving...60 miles per hour. The damn thing went up, vertical and then shattered in the middle of the road. It was like a fucking cockpit cover being released on a fighter jet going Mach 1. I kept driving...in shame. Basically, it went like this ---> - then ---> l and finally ---> .........

Beach - Yup. Did some stuff and things with someone in my truck near the beach entrance where South 7th Street zags.

Pupper - Whenever I took Laddie anywhere I had to do two things. First, I had to roll the window down so he could get his head and shoulders out the window. Second, I had to move the seat forward so he could reach the arm rest on the door. It didn't matter where we went. I will always remember Laddie enjoying the ride.

97 MPH - Driving down FF trying to get the governor on my truck to shut off the engine. It did. A few times. Actually, maybe more than a few.

Cruising in GB - Jamie and I, thinking we were gangstas, cruised the mean streets of Green Bay. There was nothing gangsta about it. However, we had a lot of fun doing it. Especially, the McDonald's detours when we were "craving" some fries.

DUI Stop - Quite possibly the luckiest Jeff and I ever were. We had just closed down Score's after a night of drinking (Damn, I miss that place.) with a bar close Purple Haze shot. Neither one of us should have been driving, but Jeff volunteered. I'm pretty persuasive. Off of Eisner Avenue, Jeff got pulled over for a drunk stop. Not sure of the actual reason we were stopped since he was driving decent. Jeff passed the field sobriety test, but blew a 0.16 on the Breathalyzer. I, in my infinite wisdom, volunteered to take a Breathalyzer to see if I could drive. I only blew a 0.058. However, the cop would not let me drive either. The best part is that the cop let Jeff off with nothing. Not even a written warning. All we had to do was call for a ride. Oh, yeah. Thanks for picking us up, Ed.

Tail Light Confusion - I once was pulled over for having illegal tail light covers. (Nothing fancy. Just the ones that Auto Zone sold.) Then a month after I took them off, I was pulled over for having too bright of tail lights. Both times were potential drunk stops since they were late at night. Both times I was 100% sober. Thank God.

Fucking 4th and 26 - This one was stupid. It was the closest I've ever puked in my truck...and it just happened to be going 45 MPH. And oh, yeah...I was driving down Bridgewood. So here I am, driving down the road at 3 am. My door is open and I'm leaning out to vomit...multiple times...while still keeping the truck on the road. Either sheer genius or utter stupidity.

Rough Night? - After Greg's 21st birthday party/Home Depot staff party, I left Maple Lanes and headed home. I don't really remember much. I might have had a bit too much vodka. However, when I woke up, my Dad greeted me with a chuckle and a "Had a rough night, huh?" After a few brief moments with a stupid look on my face, he clued me in. Turns out I had parked my truck in the middle of the lawn. Apparently, I missed our circle driveway completely. Don't drink and drive, kids. It'll fuck you up.